At eighty-five pounds everything was difficult. Getting a glass of water was tough. Going to work was tough. Putting my clothes on was tough. Life was tough. But, I had one thing, one sweet silvery prize. Thinness. The victory every time I walked into a store and a piece of designer-ish clothing fell loosely on my sparse body. The feelings of conquest when I passed up yet another dessert or seconds at dinner. Now, what I did not know was that the entire time I was “eating healthier” by adding massive amounts of soy protein into my diet among other things I was also suffering from an undiagnosed soy allergy, which made me sick almost every time I ate (well, anything I ate anything with soy in it-which turned out to be more than I had ever imagined).
But, in the end, I was happy to be thin and even though I did not feel well I did enjoy looking thin, people commenting that I was so thin and never feeling like something would not fit. The victory was shallow. The victory was defeat, and eventually hunger won me over. Thank God.
Now, who’s hungry? When is the last time you ate a piece of food and savored the taste in your mouth? When did you last lick a cupcake wrapper, or slowly lick frosting off the top? When did you get a milk mustache and laugh, or watch ooey gooey melted cheese stick to your entire face?
When did you last really enjoy food? Feeling good has become my new obsession and part of feeling good is feeling happy. Happiness is a tough journey to travel but it leads you to some wonderful places. Happiness comes from good health, good company, good food. Join me as I celebrate all of these things, one delicious day at a time.